On the eve of 6-1 Children's Day, in order to strengthen better emotional communication between children and their parents, King&Capital Law Firm specially organized a salon on "Emotional guidance in parent-child relationship", which invited Ms. Fu Junhua, Managing Director of Junlian Capital, to bring you a lively and wonderful sharing. This salon invited Ms. Fu Junhua, Managing Director of Junlian Capital, to bring you a vivid and wonderful sharing, and the lawyers in the firm actively participated in the interactive exchange.

 

If your child is a product, 18 years old, what kind of ability and characteristics do you want your child to have?

How many years have you been a parent and have you learned how to be a parent?

When was the last time you were angry with your child? Is your child willing to talk to you about what's on his/her mind?

Do you want your child's education to be inwardly scrolling? How do you get your child to take the initiative to learn? How do you deal with rebellion?

What kind of parent-child relationship is a good state?

Are we giving our children quality companionship? How to involve the other half in family education?

By recognizing the emotion words in the "Emotion and Energy Hierarchy", we can differentiate between positive and negative emotions. When our children's emotions are already in the low-energy zone and they need to draw strength from their parents, the feedback we give to our children must be to increase their energy, not to continue to consume it; by using the "Family IQ Genetic Through the "family IQ genetic oscillogram", we can see that the development of the family is fluctuating, and when the child happens to be at a certain level, there is no need to pluck the seedling to grow up, but to let nature take its course; and finally, about the "change of parental identity", the child from infancy, early childhood, childhood, adolescence, puberty and then adulthood, the identity of the parents also gradually changed from babysitting to parental identity. From infancy, toddlerhood, childhood, adolescence, puberty and adulthood, the identity of parents gradually changes from babysitting, guiding, training, coaching and mentoring to spiritual leadership. The transformation of both parties is inseparable from the acceptance of the environment, the choice of behaviors, the search for competence, the construction of beliefs, the awakening of identity, and the systematic handing over of the child's life to the child himself or herself.

When speaking about the parent-child relationship, one basic question actually needs to be answered: what kind of being is the child in everyone's mind? For example, in everyone's mind the child is a piece of artwork, a seed.

Some lawyers think that a child is a seed that needs to be cared for and irrigated so that it can thrive; some lawyers think that a child is a gift, and that a child and its parents accompany each other and love and care for each other.

In fact, every child is born as a seed of a different fruit - apple, pear, banana, pineapple, watermelon and so on. Mainstream values may feel that "apples are best". But what if the child happens to be another fruit instead of an apple?

The "responsible" behavior is to let pears be pears and bananas be bananas. Instead of desperately trying to make pears and bananas, be apples. It does take great courage, and deep, unconditional love for the child.

"Because we may only know how the mainstream of society's apples should be raised. We know neither what kind of fruit our children are, nor how fruits other than apples should be raised. What to do. Let go, respect, encourage, support, love." Paying it forward in a heartfelt way.

The most important thing in shaping a child's outlook on life and values is accompaniment and discovery. Although the process of accompaniment is very long, it is a must for every parent to discover a child's characteristics and potentials in the process of accompaniment.

Finally, Mr. Fu introduced the Hawkins Energy Map, Iceberg Model and ABC Theory to assist everyone in perceiving their own emotional changes, capturing emotional points, eliminating negative energy through analysis and reflection, and improving parent-child relationship. The attorneys present at the seminar were very impressed and benefited from the seminar.

Translated with DeepL.com (free version)